Dr. Chapman – The Marriage You’ve Always Wanted
Part 1 – The Purpose of Marriage and Communication(my title not his)
A couple weekends ago I got the incredible opportunity to learn from the wisdom of Dr. Gary Chapman. He graciously accepted our church’s offer to come speak on “The Marriage You’ve Always Wanted”. Sounds cliché, huh? Well, it’s not. When you are centering your life around God and how HE designed marriage to work, you will most definitely have the marriage you’ve always wanted. I got to talk with him and his sweet North Carolina accent and he was kind and just smiling. I like people that smile. It’s like you could see the goodness of God just oozing through him. I am so grateful for the time that I got to spend diving in God’s word and learning how to better my marriage. And because I think it is such valuable information, I would like to share some of the things that I learned, my notes and thoughts, to do with it what you will. Maybe you can use this to help better your marriage or help your idea of how a God-centered successful marriage should be.
First, I thought it was interesting to hear that 50% of women say that they have un-communicating husbands and 86% of divorces people admit that it was mostly because of deficient communication. When it all boils down, they say, “We just couldn’t communicate” or “We didn’t have anything to communicate about (or in common) anymore”.
What is the purpose of marriage? According to Gen 2:18,24 it is Unity and Intimacy. This passage says vs 18 “The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” And vs. 24 “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” Well, I can’t imagine someone saying that the have perfect unity and intimacy and never communicate. The two automatically intertwine.
How do you communicate? 2 Corinthians 6:11-13 says “We have spoken freely to you, Corinthians, and opened wide our hearts to you. 12 We are not withholding our affection from you, but you are withholding yours from us. 13 As a fair exchange—I speak as to my children—open wide your hearts also.” So the answer is to open your hearts and listen to others. This is two-fold. You can’t listen to others and get to know them if you are always talking. And likewise for the other portion – you can’t just be silent and never open up and expect a connection between the two. I know from a personal level that it makes me feel so special when Brian shares with me something that happened in his day or even something that made me mad. He is opening up and letting me in to see how he feels and thinks about the events in his life. It makes a huge difference. Communication is an act of the will. It is not a factor of your personality. You either choose to communicate or you don’t. Yes, this just popped the bubble of the excuse “I’m just not a talker”. If you want to please your significant other and have a better relationship, communication is KEY.
There are 3 levels to communication:
1. Day to Day Events – This is the most simple form of communication. Dr. Chapman cracked me up when he gave an example of the normal daily conversation. “How was your day, honey?” “Fine.” “How was yours?” “Fine.” Dr. Chapman became more animated than I expected and said FINE?!?! You have been apart for 10-12 hours and the only thing that you can sum up to describe that time apart is FINE?! When I really thought about that, it sank in. I leave the house at 6:30-6:40ish to drop off Ryot and I don’t get home after picking Ryot up until around 6:30-7:00ish. When I talk to Brian it sometimes is easier to say “Good” when he asks me how my day was. A suggestion that was given for bettering communication of day to day events was this: Tell me 3 things that happened today and how you felt about them. Dr. Chapman made me laugh again as he explained that it didn’t have to be profound. It could be as simple as, “Honey, I got a drink of water today. And it made me feel refreshed.” The look on his face and his demeanor when he said it just made everyone crack a smile and chuckle a little. It really is a simple concept. And what he said next really struck home. He said “Husbands, if you do this daily with your wife, you will not have simply told her about your day, but given her 20 minutes of your life.” I would love if Brian told me about his day and how he felt about it. The key is making sure that you include how you FELT about it. I know, people don’t like talking about feelings or some men think it is too girly to talk about how you feel. But I can tell you right now that when Brian takes time to tell me how he feels about a certain subject, it lets me in to who he is. It pulls me closer to him and makes me feel like we are connected and intertwined together not just merely coexisting.
2. Decision Making – This is the 2nd level of communication. This can be as easy as what you want to eat or as difficult as where to live or how to raise your children. This step is pretty straightforward until it turns into a conflict.
I did say that there are 3 levels of communication and I’m stopping at #2. This is because the 3rd level is about conflict and there are still thoughts and notes that I have to go through to compile them and don’t want to bombard anyone with crazy amounts of information that I haven’t even really sorted through. I just wanted to get this out because I’m super excited about it and how it is already shaping and changing my marriage.
Be back soon!
Thursday, October 4, 2012
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
Giving God ALL the Glory
There are so many things I want to write about. In the near future, you can expect blogs on the marriage conference, the sermon on the family you've always wanted and many other thoughts, motivations, encouragements and whatnot that I have running constantly through my brain. I have been overloaded lately and just trying to sort through the madness! Can I blame Ryot a little? Maybe say that she took some of my brain cells? I don't know but that's what I'm rolling with. :)
Lately, my brain can not get unwrapped around the idea of God's glory (and I don't mind it one bit). Through Rocky Bayou Baptist Church, Rocky Bayou Christian School, The Purpose Driven Life, and countless leaders, influences and friends that I experienced growing up, my soul was branded with the realization of my purpose for life. I believe whole-heartedly that my purpose on this earth is to glorify God. This begins as I wake up in the morning and is woven through every experience throughout the 24 hours that I am blessed with.
At first, it was just a statement. Then it was a nice poem to recite with no real meaning or understanding behind it. But when it hit me - and I say hit because it felt like a ton of bricks waking me up from a mediocre slumber - I was mindblown. When you finally realize that everything that happens, everyone who breaths, everything that exists does so just for the sole purpose of glorifying God, there is no way not to be changed. While this has been occupying my thoughts, I am reminded of what Jesus said in Luke 19:40. Jesus and his disciples were going to Jerusalem and his discples were shouting his praise saying, "Blessed is the king who comes in the name of the Lord! Peace in heaven and glory in the highest!”. (Luke 19:38) The Pharisees were mad and told Jesus to rebuke his discples. I don't know but I can see Jesus almost smiling in verse 40 which says, "I tell you,” He[Jesus] replied, “if they[disciples] keep quiet, the stones will cry out."
This makes me smile and hurts my heart at the same time. It makes me smile because creation screams His praise everyday. Creation spins in orbit exactly as it is commanded to do. It obeys because it doesn't have a choice and it brings God glory daily. But it makes me sad because we are commanded to do the same. We are commanded to praise him, make disciples, love others, etc, all these things that would bring God glory. We have the choice to obey him and often times we get caught up in what we think would bring us happiness. We don't realize that bringing God glory and dwelling in His presence is the only place to receive the perfect, overflowing, never-ending love and joy that we could ever experience. And a crazy thing about it is when we do choose to run after things that don't please him, He forgives us and is glorified through our repentance.
When I am having a good day, my purpose is to glorify God.
When I am struggling with insecurities - glorify God.
When I am scared or anxious about the future - glorify God.
When I am bored or feeling uninspired - glorify God.
When I am hurting from past wounds or current tragedies - glorify God.
When I am angry from injustice - glorify God.
Glorify God. Period.
This is not a request, but a commandment. And a commandment with a promise to be filled with the joy, peace and very presence of the Holy Spirit. It's not an act we carry out begrudgingly, but a commandment that when completed with a right heart attitude, will give us the greatest joy and peace that we could ever imagine experiencing.
Now the question that I wrestled with for a long time: How is this carried out practically in my day to day life?
God sees all of eternity. The 80, 90, 100 years that we are on earth is not even a hiccup on the radar of eternity. But me? I'm stuck in this 7 days a week, 24 hours a day, 60 minutes an hour mentality. For me, it's harder to have what we call an 'eternal perspective'. I have things concerning me like my daughter getting disciplinary write ups for biting another a child, paying my rent so we have a place to live, fixing my car so I have reliable transportation, etc. Now I don't think any of this is bad. In fact, these are the very things that aid me in giving God glory. Everywhere I go I have the opportunity to be a living story of God's grace. I could probably survey your life and tell you ways that you can glorify God but this isn't about completing a checklist. This is about daily communion with the Almighty Abba Father and a great desire to bring Him glory. In my race of life, I have found that only falling at His feet and seeking His will for my life have I been successful at glorifying him in my deeds and thoughts. God is interested not in how much money you give, but your heart behind the giving. God is given the praise when our thoughts, actions and motives line up with His will and our desire to live a life filled by the Holy Spirit.
When I think about this awesome fact, this purpose, that I was created, designed even for the purpose of glorifying God, I just smile because honestly it makes life so much easier. It changes everything. Instead of crying to God and screaming "why has this happened to me?". The questions turn into desperate prayers for guidance. "God, I don't know why this is happeneing, but You do. Help me to glorify you through this trial." I'm not perfect...at all. I fail constantly, but daily I am reminded that He doesn't expect or require perfect.
What that means in my life in its entirety, I'm not exactly sure yet. I don't know how God will use me or what people or experiences will cross my path. All I know is that I serve a great, mighty, powerful, forgiving, loving, tender, righteous, perfect God who deserves all the glory and praise that I can give Him.
Lately, my brain can not get unwrapped around the idea of God's glory (and I don't mind it one bit). Through Rocky Bayou Baptist Church, Rocky Bayou Christian School, The Purpose Driven Life, and countless leaders, influences and friends that I experienced growing up, my soul was branded with the realization of my purpose for life. I believe whole-heartedly that my purpose on this earth is to glorify God. This begins as I wake up in the morning and is woven through every experience throughout the 24 hours that I am blessed with.
At first, it was just a statement. Then it was a nice poem to recite with no real meaning or understanding behind it. But when it hit me - and I say hit because it felt like a ton of bricks waking me up from a mediocre slumber - I was mindblown. When you finally realize that everything that happens, everyone who breaths, everything that exists does so just for the sole purpose of glorifying God, there is no way not to be changed. While this has been occupying my thoughts, I am reminded of what Jesus said in Luke 19:40. Jesus and his disciples were going to Jerusalem and his discples were shouting his praise saying, "Blessed is the king who comes in the name of the Lord! Peace in heaven and glory in the highest!”. (Luke 19:38) The Pharisees were mad and told Jesus to rebuke his discples. I don't know but I can see Jesus almost smiling in verse 40 which says, "I tell you,” He[Jesus] replied, “if they[disciples] keep quiet, the stones will cry out."
This makes me smile and hurts my heart at the same time. It makes me smile because creation screams His praise everyday. Creation spins in orbit exactly as it is commanded to do. It obeys because it doesn't have a choice and it brings God glory daily. But it makes me sad because we are commanded to do the same. We are commanded to praise him, make disciples, love others, etc, all these things that would bring God glory. We have the choice to obey him and often times we get caught up in what we think would bring us happiness. We don't realize that bringing God glory and dwelling in His presence is the only place to receive the perfect, overflowing, never-ending love and joy that we could ever experience. And a crazy thing about it is when we do choose to run after things that don't please him, He forgives us and is glorified through our repentance.
When I am having a good day, my purpose is to glorify God.
When I am struggling with insecurities - glorify God.
When I am scared or anxious about the future - glorify God.
When I am bored or feeling uninspired - glorify God.
When I am hurting from past wounds or current tragedies - glorify God.
When I am angry from injustice - glorify God.
Glorify God. Period.
This is not a request, but a commandment. And a commandment with a promise to be filled with the joy, peace and very presence of the Holy Spirit. It's not an act we carry out begrudgingly, but a commandment that when completed with a right heart attitude, will give us the greatest joy and peace that we could ever imagine experiencing.
Now the question that I wrestled with for a long time: How is this carried out practically in my day to day life?
God sees all of eternity. The 80, 90, 100 years that we are on earth is not even a hiccup on the radar of eternity. But me? I'm stuck in this 7 days a week, 24 hours a day, 60 minutes an hour mentality. For me, it's harder to have what we call an 'eternal perspective'. I have things concerning me like my daughter getting disciplinary write ups for biting another a child, paying my rent so we have a place to live, fixing my car so I have reliable transportation, etc. Now I don't think any of this is bad. In fact, these are the very things that aid me in giving God glory. Everywhere I go I have the opportunity to be a living story of God's grace. I could probably survey your life and tell you ways that you can glorify God but this isn't about completing a checklist. This is about daily communion with the Almighty Abba Father and a great desire to bring Him glory. In my race of life, I have found that only falling at His feet and seeking His will for my life have I been successful at glorifying him in my deeds and thoughts. God is interested not in how much money you give, but your heart behind the giving. God is given the praise when our thoughts, actions and motives line up with His will and our desire to live a life filled by the Holy Spirit.
When I think about this awesome fact, this purpose, that I was created, designed even for the purpose of glorifying God, I just smile because honestly it makes life so much easier. It changes everything. Instead of crying to God and screaming "why has this happened to me?". The questions turn into desperate prayers for guidance. "God, I don't know why this is happeneing, but You do. Help me to glorify you through this trial." I'm not perfect...at all. I fail constantly, but daily I am reminded that He doesn't expect or require perfect.
What that means in my life in its entirety, I'm not exactly sure yet. I don't know how God will use me or what people or experiences will cross my path. All I know is that I serve a great, mighty, powerful, forgiving, loving, tender, righteous, perfect God who deserves all the glory and praise that I can give Him.
Friday, September 14, 2012
Three Years!
I didn't know what I was getting into. All I knew was that I was in love and I was making one of the biggest decisions of my life...and I couldn't be happier. I envisioned life in the years to come. My dreams included a huge house with secret rooms and a big yard with a pool, a house full of children, a couple puppies lounging around and a lifetime of "story-book" romance with my new husband. Three years ago today, I said "I do" to a handsome poker player in front of a grumpy old man judge in a courthouse and exchanged my last name to Taylor.
I had no idea the twists and turns that life would bring me.
I had no idea the incredible freedom in Christ I would experience because of those "devastating" obstacles. Our life has been pretty much everything BUT that "story-book" romance that I wanted...and I am SO thankful. God had bigger and way better plans for me than I could ever have planned for myself. (No, I did not intend to steal that from A Walk To Remember but it stands true all the same)
Through everything that has happened, I could not ask for a better husband and best friend. I know that God is shaping our lives each day and I am looking forward to the years to come!
We are 978 miles apart. We don't get to celebrate with a candle-lit dinner. I didn't wake up to flowers and a card next to me this morning (a little jealous, Julia!). But that is not what God has for us at this moment. God has me praying for you to have a good day and that He would draw you closer to His heart every moment. God has me hoping that you get your package that I sent you by Saturday. God has me making sure that our daughter hears your voice and sees your picture every day. God has me trusting and relying on Him for my validation and love so that our relationship is stronger than it ever was or what I ever dreamt it could be.
I love you Brian Taylor. I love your smile. I love your dimples. I love your laugh. I love how it feels in your arms. I love your sense of humor. I love how you love Izzy, Vini and Ryot. I love you for the man that you are and the man that God is shaping you to be.
I love you forever...
I had no idea the twists and turns that life would bring me.
I had no idea the incredible freedom in Christ I would experience because of those "devastating" obstacles. Our life has been pretty much everything BUT that "story-book" romance that I wanted...and I am SO thankful. God had bigger and way better plans for me than I could ever have planned for myself. (No, I did not intend to steal that from A Walk To Remember but it stands true all the same)
Through everything that has happened, I could not ask for a better husband and best friend. I know that God is shaping our lives each day and I am looking forward to the years to come!
We are 978 miles apart. We don't get to celebrate with a candle-lit dinner. I didn't wake up to flowers and a card next to me this morning (a little jealous, Julia!). But that is not what God has for us at this moment. God has me praying for you to have a good day and that He would draw you closer to His heart every moment. God has me hoping that you get your package that I sent you by Saturday. God has me making sure that our daughter hears your voice and sees your picture every day. God has me trusting and relying on Him for my validation and love so that our relationship is stronger than it ever was or what I ever dreamt it could be.
I love you Brian Taylor. I love your smile. I love your dimples. I love your laugh. I love how it feels in your arms. I love your sense of humor. I love how you love Izzy, Vini and Ryot. I love you for the man that you are and the man that God is shaping you to be.
I love you forever...
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
Struggling today!
REALLY struggling with the past today.
I hate feeling like this.
I know that God is good.
I know that He is my full portion and sustaining God.
I know that He has me in His loving hands.
He is Sovereign. He is perfect. He is forgiving. He is loving.
I have to forgive just as He forgives me.
I have to trust that His plan is going to bring Him glory.
God, I desire to bring you glory even through pain if that is what you call for my life.
I hate feeling like this.
I know that God is good.
I know that He is my full portion and sustaining God.
I know that He has me in His loving hands.
He is Sovereign. He is perfect. He is forgiving. He is loving.
I have to forgive just as He forgives me.
I have to trust that His plan is going to bring Him glory.
God, I desire to bring you glory even through pain if that is what you call for my life.
Wednesday, August 29, 2012
Nazarene Essay: God is Faithful!
Just wanted to share the essay that Brian wrote for Nazarene Bible College. This just further shows where his heart is and how God is leading us.
"My experience is one that is especially amazing to me. I remember going to church when I was little but I don’t remember praying or asking Jesus into my heart. As the years went by, my family didn’t go to church anymore and I had grown accustomed to not going. My wife is a believer and was when we got married, but I was lost or should I say blinded as in 2 Corinthians 4:4. I was very selfish and thought that I could do anything I wanted no matter the consequences. I finally got to the point where I hit my knees and asked God to enter my heart, to never leave and to guide my life. I knew that he was the only way. Tears were streaming down my face and I have never felt anything like that peace at that moment. It was as if my shoulders were no longer heavy. Our Lord and Savior had entered me and forgiven all my transgressions.
After that emotional day, I didn’t know where to go, but God gave me guidance. I had never prayed before, so I asked my wife’s uncle who is a leader in his home church in Florida to disciple me and we started meeting weekly. I didn’t know what church to go to but my wife recommended on for me to visit until we chose First Baptist Church of Pearland to attend together. I didn’t have a Bible but with technology I downloaded the Bible on my phone and had access to every version. God was faithful and answered every prayer and equipped me with all of these blessings. Praise the Lord!
One day, I was driving home from dropping my wife at work and my daughter was talking gibberish in the backseat. It was, by all accounts, a normal morning. Suddenly, my heart lit up like a fire cracker and I felt goose bumps all over my body. I knew that somehow I had to tell everyone that I came in contact with who Jesus Christ is and what he has done. I had never felt like this before nor was I expecting this answer. God had spoken so clearly and I knew this was what I had to do.
When I was looking for employment in Texas, I found a commercial janitorial company who was hiring an operations manager. Since this had been my field of expertise for the past 10 years, I applied. The interview went very smooth and my qualifications were exactly what he was looking for. I intensely prayed for this job but after two weeks I hadn’t heard anything. One Sunday my Pastor asked how the job search was going and my wife replied that if I didn’t get this job then that would definitely be a sign that God had other plans for me. After another week of silence, I emailed the company. The response was disheartening to say the least. The door was closed which was beyond my understanding, but God’s plans were bigger than mine.
During all these days of waiting, I researched the company and among other things I saw that the owner had a Bachelor’s degree from Nazarene University. Since I was also looking for schools to further my education, this made me dig deeper. All of the colleges that I was interested in attending were Bible Colleges. After three days of seeking the Lord non-stop for his will about school, Nazarene Bible College caught my eye. I called and was kindly greeted and given information about the school. As I prayed, God very quickly opened doors in Colorado Springs. I called my friends and family asking them if they knew anyone was hiring. The quick response was amazing! Within one week I had a place to stay, a car and a job that was waiting for me. Praise the Lord for opening doors to where he wants me to study his word.
For so long, I was an operations manager for a commercial janitorial company. My main job responsibility was taking care of the clients and employees that I managed. On a daily basis, I visited different clients to make sure that their needs were met. Also, for two years I was a trainer at a call center. It was my passion to help people understand the curriculum that I was teaching. Talking in front of a crowd was never a problem for me. I know that with the right guidance, I can effectively spread the word. I have never been to college before, however I do know that my calling is to be a Pastor and spread the good news. I have never been more sure of anything in my life. He is my light and my salvation. I trust that God will lead me to what tools and resources I need to accomplish this. I want to learn everything I can at Nazarene about our Lord and Savior.
As I attended my church in Pearland, I saw our senior pastor, Pastor Sonny, and my Sunday school teacher, Jason, explain the word with incredible knowledge and understanding. Everyone is there to worship our Lord and Savior, to help the lost, to minister to each other and to learn more about God. Now more than ever I know that this is what I am called to do. I see myself in the pulpit and in front of a Sunday school class explaining the word. I will greatly miss my church but I know that God is sending me on a different path that will glorify him. So as Jesus calls in Matthew 4:19, I am following and will always follow his path!"
Praise the Lord for his continued faithfulness in our lives!
"My experience is one that is especially amazing to me. I remember going to church when I was little but I don’t remember praying or asking Jesus into my heart. As the years went by, my family didn’t go to church anymore and I had grown accustomed to not going. My wife is a believer and was when we got married, but I was lost or should I say blinded as in 2 Corinthians 4:4. I was very selfish and thought that I could do anything I wanted no matter the consequences. I finally got to the point where I hit my knees and asked God to enter my heart, to never leave and to guide my life. I knew that he was the only way. Tears were streaming down my face and I have never felt anything like that peace at that moment. It was as if my shoulders were no longer heavy. Our Lord and Savior had entered me and forgiven all my transgressions.
After that emotional day, I didn’t know where to go, but God gave me guidance. I had never prayed before, so I asked my wife’s uncle who is a leader in his home church in Florida to disciple me and we started meeting weekly. I didn’t know what church to go to but my wife recommended on for me to visit until we chose First Baptist Church of Pearland to attend together. I didn’t have a Bible but with technology I downloaded the Bible on my phone and had access to every version. God was faithful and answered every prayer and equipped me with all of these blessings. Praise the Lord!
One day, I was driving home from dropping my wife at work and my daughter was talking gibberish in the backseat. It was, by all accounts, a normal morning. Suddenly, my heart lit up like a fire cracker and I felt goose bumps all over my body. I knew that somehow I had to tell everyone that I came in contact with who Jesus Christ is and what he has done. I had never felt like this before nor was I expecting this answer. God had spoken so clearly and I knew this was what I had to do.
When I was looking for employment in Texas, I found a commercial janitorial company who was hiring an operations manager. Since this had been my field of expertise for the past 10 years, I applied. The interview went very smooth and my qualifications were exactly what he was looking for. I intensely prayed for this job but after two weeks I hadn’t heard anything. One Sunday my Pastor asked how the job search was going and my wife replied that if I didn’t get this job then that would definitely be a sign that God had other plans for me. After another week of silence, I emailed the company. The response was disheartening to say the least. The door was closed which was beyond my understanding, but God’s plans were bigger than mine.
During all these days of waiting, I researched the company and among other things I saw that the owner had a Bachelor’s degree from Nazarene University. Since I was also looking for schools to further my education, this made me dig deeper. All of the colleges that I was interested in attending were Bible Colleges. After three days of seeking the Lord non-stop for his will about school, Nazarene Bible College caught my eye. I called and was kindly greeted and given information about the school. As I prayed, God very quickly opened doors in Colorado Springs. I called my friends and family asking them if they knew anyone was hiring. The quick response was amazing! Within one week I had a place to stay, a car and a job that was waiting for me. Praise the Lord for opening doors to where he wants me to study his word.
For so long, I was an operations manager for a commercial janitorial company. My main job responsibility was taking care of the clients and employees that I managed. On a daily basis, I visited different clients to make sure that their needs were met. Also, for two years I was a trainer at a call center. It was my passion to help people understand the curriculum that I was teaching. Talking in front of a crowd was never a problem for me. I know that with the right guidance, I can effectively spread the word. I have never been to college before, however I do know that my calling is to be a Pastor and spread the good news. I have never been more sure of anything in my life. He is my light and my salvation. I trust that God will lead me to what tools and resources I need to accomplish this. I want to learn everything I can at Nazarene about our Lord and Savior.
As I attended my church in Pearland, I saw our senior pastor, Pastor Sonny, and my Sunday school teacher, Jason, explain the word with incredible knowledge and understanding. Everyone is there to worship our Lord and Savior, to help the lost, to minister to each other and to learn more about God. Now more than ever I know that this is what I am called to do. I see myself in the pulpit and in front of a Sunday school class explaining the word. I will greatly miss my church but I know that God is sending me on a different path that will glorify him. So as Jesus calls in Matthew 4:19, I am following and will always follow his path!"
Praise the Lord for his continued faithfulness in our lives!
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
Ministry - The beginning of a great adventure
“Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ, who gave himself for our sins to deliver us from the present evil age, according to the will of our God and Father, to whom be the glory forever and ever. Amen” Galatians 1:3-5
I thought it fitting to begin this “letter” this way because of the good news that we have to share. Also, I’ve always thought it was an eloquent way to begin a letter to the people that we love.
We have definitely had an interesting year. We can proudly say that God has been working in our lives and providing restoration as individuals, in our marriage, as parents, and in our family as a whole. We can’t praise him enough for the good, bad, ugly and miraculous things that have happened because they have led us to a deeper appreciation and knowledge of the Sovereign God that we serve.
Through talking with our Pastor, talking with each other, praying through scripture and seeking God’s guidance, we can say with confidence that God has called Brian in the ministry. God has thoroughly lit a fire in both of our hearts to pursue this path. We know that it won’t be easy, but we are trusting that God is doing a good work in us and we are thanking “Him who has given me strength, Christ Jesus our Lord, because He judged me faithful, appointing me to His service”. (1 Tim 1:12)
What does this mean practically? Well within one week of us confirming our obedience to this calling, God moved big mountains. As we were looking into the different schools and options that are available, God very clearly led us to Colorado Springs by providing Brian a place to stay, a car, financial aid for a great school, and a good job that he can start at any time. While all of these doors were opening, when we weren’t looking for them at all, all of the options that we WERE pursuing here in Pearland continued to close. We got passed up for some jobs that there is no reason that Brian should not have gotten it other than, God’s will. This being said, we are so grateful for such a clear voice of direction from our Provider and Brian will hopefully be starting school at Nazarene Bible College in November. Our lease in Pearland is not complete until the end of Jan 2013 so I will be staying in Pearland, working and holding down the fort. God has provided all of the things that we need in order for us to flourish in Colorado and an added bonus is that we will be closer to Brian’s oldest kiddos, Izzy and Vini. We have missed them very much and are excited that we will all get to spend time together as a family. I love all of my siblings and I am so happy for Ryot to get to experience this as well.
It makes us sad to think about leaving, but we know that the relationships that we have built here in Pearland are lasting will be continued even from states away. And the relationships that were already long distance will now have a beautiful mountainous vacation spot! We don’t know if this is where God will keep us, but we do know that this is where he is leading us now. Please keep us in your prayers as we seek to be obedient and carry out his word to the world. We have no other desire than to glorify God and spread his great message.
This is the beginning of a great adventure.
Loves,
The Taylor Family
I thought it fitting to begin this “letter” this way because of the good news that we have to share. Also, I’ve always thought it was an eloquent way to begin a letter to the people that we love.
We have definitely had an interesting year. We can proudly say that God has been working in our lives and providing restoration as individuals, in our marriage, as parents, and in our family as a whole. We can’t praise him enough for the good, bad, ugly and miraculous things that have happened because they have led us to a deeper appreciation and knowledge of the Sovereign God that we serve.
Through talking with our Pastor, talking with each other, praying through scripture and seeking God’s guidance, we can say with confidence that God has called Brian in the ministry. God has thoroughly lit a fire in both of our hearts to pursue this path. We know that it won’t be easy, but we are trusting that God is doing a good work in us and we are thanking “Him who has given me strength, Christ Jesus our Lord, because He judged me faithful, appointing me to His service”. (1 Tim 1:12)
What does this mean practically? Well within one week of us confirming our obedience to this calling, God moved big mountains. As we were looking into the different schools and options that are available, God very clearly led us to Colorado Springs by providing Brian a place to stay, a car, financial aid for a great school, and a good job that he can start at any time. While all of these doors were opening, when we weren’t looking for them at all, all of the options that we WERE pursuing here in Pearland continued to close. We got passed up for some jobs that there is no reason that Brian should not have gotten it other than, God’s will. This being said, we are so grateful for such a clear voice of direction from our Provider and Brian will hopefully be starting school at Nazarene Bible College in November. Our lease in Pearland is not complete until the end of Jan 2013 so I will be staying in Pearland, working and holding down the fort. God has provided all of the things that we need in order for us to flourish in Colorado and an added bonus is that we will be closer to Brian’s oldest kiddos, Izzy and Vini. We have missed them very much and are excited that we will all get to spend time together as a family. I love all of my siblings and I am so happy for Ryot to get to experience this as well.
It makes us sad to think about leaving, but we know that the relationships that we have built here in Pearland are lasting will be continued even from states away. And the relationships that were already long distance will now have a beautiful mountainous vacation spot! We don’t know if this is where God will keep us, but we do know that this is where he is leading us now. Please keep us in your prayers as we seek to be obedient and carry out his word to the world. We have no other desire than to glorify God and spread his great message.
This is the beginning of a great adventure.
Loves,
The Taylor Family
Thursday, August 16, 2012
Not-so-drought-status
Brian and I were driving home on a wednesday evening and we heard a song on the radio talking about how God is faithful through the drought and through the storm. We talked about how we have definitely had our share of storms this year and now we are in a drought. Still jobless, we agreed that we just need to wait on the Lord. The next day, we hear a song talking about waiting on the Lord...Ok, God, we are waiting on you, show us your direction. Fast forward to Sunday, a conversation starts during Sunday School and I get to share with my friends that God is proving faithful through the drought that we are in. Well, another couple days go by and it's wednesday night again. Brian and I are getting encouragement and advice from our passionate God-fearing leader (love our Pastor!). He is asking us how the past 3 weeks had been and what we learned. We explain that God is good and our relationship is worlds better than what it has been. We were proud and happy to tell him that we have been praying every morning and evening together and seeking the Lord's will for our lives. Then we got to explain to him that God was being faithful through the drought that we were in. To that he laughed and replied, "That doesn't sound like a drought to me. That sounds like a fresh, cool spring with waves and a waterfall." That literally stopped me in my tracks. He then went on to explain what a miracle it was that Brian and I were not only together, but thriving in love, and serving the Lord together. It was a complete turn-around from where we were just a couple months ago to now.
We already know that God is in control. We already know that he is going to take care of us. But just because we aren't getting the directions and instructions in what we think is a timely manner, we labeled it a drought. Yes, we still need a job but that doesn't mean everything about our lives is drought-status. But during the 3 times that I explained about this drought it was never followed through with how amazing of a miracle God's love and forgiveness is. God's forgiveness that is unconditional. He stretched out his hand to my husband who was literally drowning in the traps and snares of the world. He softened and healed my broken and tattered heart. He brought us together to not only be able to tolerate each other but find true God-centered, open, honest, trusting, agape love. How precious is this gift of salvation and reconcilation?!
Chris Tomlin says best how I am feeling right now:
It's your kindness Lord
That leads us to repentance
Your favor Lord, is our desire
It's your beauty Lord
That makes us stand in silence
And your love, your love
Is better than life!!!!!!
I'm really looking forward to fellowshiping with my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ on Sunday morning and starting a new Bible study on Sunday night. As of today, I think I will just spend some quiet time praising the Lord for my marriage, our beautiful children (Izzy, Vini and Ryot) and just loving the Lord for who He is.
God is Good. God is Great. God is worthy to be praised!
We already know that God is in control. We already know that he is going to take care of us. But just because we aren't getting the directions and instructions in what we think is a timely manner, we labeled it a drought. Yes, we still need a job but that doesn't mean everything about our lives is drought-status. But during the 3 times that I explained about this drought it was never followed through with how amazing of a miracle God's love and forgiveness is. God's forgiveness that is unconditional. He stretched out his hand to my husband who was literally drowning in the traps and snares of the world. He softened and healed my broken and tattered heart. He brought us together to not only be able to tolerate each other but find true God-centered, open, honest, trusting, agape love. How precious is this gift of salvation and reconcilation?!
Chris Tomlin says best how I am feeling right now:
It's your kindness Lord
That leads us to repentance
Your favor Lord, is our desire
It's your beauty Lord
That makes us stand in silence
And your love, your love
Is better than life!!!!!!
I'm really looking forward to fellowshiping with my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ on Sunday morning and starting a new Bible study on Sunday night. As of today, I think I will just spend some quiet time praising the Lord for my marriage, our beautiful children (Izzy, Vini and Ryot) and just loving the Lord for who He is.
God is Good. God is Great. God is worthy to be praised!
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
Baggage Claim Reunion
I was terrified. I was sitting at the baggage claim watching all of the family's reunite. Some couples would see each other and just smile and walk away together, some would be greeted with a big embrace, but very few walked away without someone by their side. Ryot kept me fairly entertained with her giggles and curiosity. She definitely kept me busy by having to chase her down and keep her from eating pennies off of the dirty airport tile. But still, there was a knot the size of Texas in my stomach. I was excited, nervous, happy, curious, anxious, TERRIFIED. When I got the text that he was on his way to the baggage claim, I froze. In that moment it hit me that I was about to see him...actually see him in person. I couldn't hide my emotions. I couldn't pretend to be anything I wasn't because he would be right in front of me. When I finally saw him on the other side of the building, I waved, and then remembered that he is practically blind so I kinda laughed and walked closer to see him. He saw us and I went in for a kinda weird side hug that I don't think he was prepared for. Then we had about 10 minutes of awkward silence mixed with "small talk" conversation such as:
"Are you hungry?"
"No, I ate in Tulsa at the airport"
"How was your flight?"
"Good.........I missed you"
"I missed you too"
Now today we are on day three of Brian being home. Praise God that Brian is home!!!! I can't explain this any other way except that God is perfect and all-knowing and merciful and loving and always always always faithful. He has drawn both Brian and myself closer to Him and brought us back together. He has restored a relationship that I thought would never be mended. It's an amazing thing when you let go and let God take over your life. There are blessings and miracles that overflow in my life that I could have never imagined. God is good. God is soooo good and gracious and kind.
There are still some awkward moments sometimes and I imagine there are still going to be awkward moments every now and then. He was gone from our lives for a long time. But through trusting God and relying on His strength, our life has been transformed. My role as a mother is being supported by a Godly, loving, helpful father. My role as a wife is slowly being discovered and supported and reintroduced through Brian's patience, care and openness. My role as a child of the Risen King is reinforced by uplifting and positive conversation and prayer with my husband. (my husband...have to admit it still feels kinda weird to say)
I read that "It is estimated that roughly 30 to 60% of all married individuals (in the United States) will engage in infidelity at some point during their marriage (see, Buss and Shackelford for review of this research). And these numbers are probably on the conservative side, when you consider that close to half of all marriages end in divorce (people are more likely to stray as relationships fall apart". Through seeking the Lord, diving in the Word to learn more about His character and learning to trust Him with every aspect of my life including reconciliation to my husband, I have found more joy than I ever knew before. A few months ago I hit a bump in the road that turned my whole world upside down. I knew that my life would never be the same. I just didn't understand that it would be BETTER than it was before. Praise God!
"Are you hungry?"
"No, I ate in Tulsa at the airport"
"How was your flight?"
"Good.........I missed you"
"I missed you too"
Now today we are on day three of Brian being home. Praise God that Brian is home!!!! I can't explain this any other way except that God is perfect and all-knowing and merciful and loving and always always always faithful. He has drawn both Brian and myself closer to Him and brought us back together. He has restored a relationship that I thought would never be mended. It's an amazing thing when you let go and let God take over your life. There are blessings and miracles that overflow in my life that I could have never imagined. God is good. God is soooo good and gracious and kind.
There are still some awkward moments sometimes and I imagine there are still going to be awkward moments every now and then. He was gone from our lives for a long time. But through trusting God and relying on His strength, our life has been transformed. My role as a mother is being supported by a Godly, loving, helpful father. My role as a wife is slowly being discovered and supported and reintroduced through Brian's patience, care and openness. My role as a child of the Risen King is reinforced by uplifting and positive conversation and prayer with my husband. (my husband...have to admit it still feels kinda weird to say)
I read that "It is estimated that roughly 30 to 60% of all married individuals (in the United States) will engage in infidelity at some point during their marriage (see, Buss and Shackelford for review of this research). And these numbers are probably on the conservative side, when you consider that close to half of all marriages end in divorce (people are more likely to stray as relationships fall apart". Through seeking the Lord, diving in the Word to learn more about His character and learning to trust Him with every aspect of my life including reconciliation to my husband, I have found more joy than I ever knew before. A few months ago I hit a bump in the road that turned my whole world upside down. I knew that my life would never be the same. I just didn't understand that it would be BETTER than it was before. Praise God!
Saturday, June 30, 2012
Per aspera ad astra
I don't know where to start in order to explain this, so I will just say God is good. No, God is beyond good. He is great and perfect and loving and omnipresent.
Today was a whirlwind of emotions and decisions completely facilitated by God. Some people say fate or luck, but this was definitely God's blessing. Through the whole day, God closed several doors and opened several more doors and windows of opportunity. In other words, Brian is coming to Houston....tomorrow.
Deep breath.
This is not what I expected or what I had planned, but I know that God has His hand and blessing on this situation. I know that this is where we are supposed to be. I know this is what we are supposed to be doing. Is it scary? yes! Is it exciting at the same time? yes! Do I want my husband home? yes! Am I emotionally, mentally, physically ready? No. But I think thats the point. I have to rely completely on God for his wisdom and strength. Before today my plan was to wait a couple months and prepare myself for him to come home. Prepare the house so that it was presentable. Prepare my heart so that I was ready for the next challenge of repairing our marriage. Prepare my body by getting back in shape so that I feel confident. But I can't lean on my own strength. If I was seriously waiting for my heart to be mended for us to be together again then I would have been waiting forever. Apart from Christ I am nothing. Apart from the healing power of the Holy Spirit, I can't heal or be ready for any challenges. I have to rely completely on God.
So that is what I am doing. God is in control and has made this happen in ways that I can not understand. Everything just happened in such perfect unison. Praise the Lord! I know that this is just the beginning of a very long road, but I also know that God is going to be glorified in our lives. I am trusting in his wisdom and following His lead.
In exactly 24 hours from now, I will be at an airport waiting to see Brian. I'm excited, nervous, anxious, happy, terrified and most of all BLESSED. Through the craziness of the last 4 months, this is my hope and my goal...that my life will be a testimony to the redemption and salvation of the merciful and righteous God. He deserves all the glory and honor and praise.
1 Peter 1:3-9 sums everything up so perfectly!
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade. This inheritance is kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time. In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire —may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the end result of your faith, the salvation of your souls.
Today was a whirlwind of emotions and decisions completely facilitated by God. Some people say fate or luck, but this was definitely God's blessing. Through the whole day, God closed several doors and opened several more doors and windows of opportunity. In other words, Brian is coming to Houston....tomorrow.
Deep breath.
This is not what I expected or what I had planned, but I know that God has His hand and blessing on this situation. I know that this is where we are supposed to be. I know this is what we are supposed to be doing. Is it scary? yes! Is it exciting at the same time? yes! Do I want my husband home? yes! Am I emotionally, mentally, physically ready? No. But I think thats the point. I have to rely completely on God for his wisdom and strength. Before today my plan was to wait a couple months and prepare myself for him to come home. Prepare the house so that it was presentable. Prepare my heart so that I was ready for the next challenge of repairing our marriage. Prepare my body by getting back in shape so that I feel confident. But I can't lean on my own strength. If I was seriously waiting for my heart to be mended for us to be together again then I would have been waiting forever. Apart from Christ I am nothing. Apart from the healing power of the Holy Spirit, I can't heal or be ready for any challenges. I have to rely completely on God.
So that is what I am doing. God is in control and has made this happen in ways that I can not understand. Everything just happened in such perfect unison. Praise the Lord! I know that this is just the beginning of a very long road, but I also know that God is going to be glorified in our lives. I am trusting in his wisdom and following His lead.
In exactly 24 hours from now, I will be at an airport waiting to see Brian. I'm excited, nervous, anxious, happy, terrified and most of all BLESSED. Through the craziness of the last 4 months, this is my hope and my goal...that my life will be a testimony to the redemption and salvation of the merciful and righteous God. He deserves all the glory and honor and praise.
1 Peter 1:3-9 sums everything up so perfectly!
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade. This inheritance is kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time. In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire —may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the end result of your faith, the salvation of your souls.
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Temporary
I have been learning a lot about God's sustaining power and His glory. This morning I read a couple verses that really touched my heart.
2 Corinthians 4:11-18
11For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may also be revealed in our mortal body.
12 So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you.
It is written: “I believed; therefore I have spoken.” Since we have that same spirit of faith, we also believe and therefore speak, 14 because we know that the one who raised the Lord Jesus from the dead will also raise us with Jesus and present us with you to himself.
15 All this is for your benefit, so that the grace that is reaching more and more people may cause thanksgiving to overflow to the glory of God.
16 Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. 17 For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.
18 So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
Now I know that I have said this before but its just a concept that I have to not just say and read but apply to everyday life.
Everything is for God's glory.
Its not as easy to apply this to everyday life but I think its the foundation of ministry, salvation and life itself. Everything encompasses joy, promotions, new babies, new friends as well as heartache, death, financial troubles, etc. everything is for God's glory so that we overflow in thankfulness and give glory to God. This passage just talks about how our bodies are wasting away but life is being renewed in us. Our bodies get old and we endure affliction so that Christ's life may be revealed in us. I have a tenancy to think that life is about me or my relationships. It's human nature. But my life is not about how well I do at my job, if i'm a good parent or good wife. Those should be the blessings that God had given us that are used as tools to give him glory. I can give him glory in my parenting because i'm sharing the love of Jesus with my daughter and raising her in the ways of the Lord so she can spread the gospel. I do well at my job so that people can see not my abilities but that of Christ in me. I am a good wife and Mt husband and I seek the Lord for guidance so that people can see the picture of what God's relationship with His children is supposed to be like. I seek the Lord for guidance in finances and pray for blessing but try to be a good steward of what I have and he does receive the glory.
I don't believe that he causes bad things to happen but I do believe that he allows then to happen so that we fall on our faces and seek and praise God. Then if we are faithful to give God the glory, our brothers and sisters will be uplifted and encouraged and those who do not believe can be drawn closer to Him. So just as vs. 18 says, we fix our eyes not on what is seen but what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary but what is unseen is eternal.
My financial trouble is temporary.
My heartache is temporary.
My fear is temporary.
My insecurity is temporary.
God's love, faithfulness, redeeming power and glory are eternal.
2 Corinthians 4:11-18
11For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may also be revealed in our mortal body.
12 So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you.
It is written: “I believed; therefore I have spoken.” Since we have that same spirit of faith, we also believe and therefore speak, 14 because we know that the one who raised the Lord Jesus from the dead will also raise us with Jesus and present us with you to himself.
15 All this is for your benefit, so that the grace that is reaching more and more people may cause thanksgiving to overflow to the glory of God.
16 Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. 17 For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.
18 So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
Now I know that I have said this before but its just a concept that I have to not just say and read but apply to everyday life.
Everything is for God's glory.
Its not as easy to apply this to everyday life but I think its the foundation of ministry, salvation and life itself. Everything encompasses joy, promotions, new babies, new friends as well as heartache, death, financial troubles, etc. everything is for God's glory so that we overflow in thankfulness and give glory to God. This passage just talks about how our bodies are wasting away but life is being renewed in us. Our bodies get old and we endure affliction so that Christ's life may be revealed in us. I have a tenancy to think that life is about me or my relationships. It's human nature. But my life is not about how well I do at my job, if i'm a good parent or good wife. Those should be the blessings that God had given us that are used as tools to give him glory. I can give him glory in my parenting because i'm sharing the love of Jesus with my daughter and raising her in the ways of the Lord so she can spread the gospel. I do well at my job so that people can see not my abilities but that of Christ in me. I am a good wife and Mt husband and I seek the Lord for guidance so that people can see the picture of what God's relationship with His children is supposed to be like. I seek the Lord for guidance in finances and pray for blessing but try to be a good steward of what I have and he does receive the glory.
I don't believe that he causes bad things to happen but I do believe that he allows then to happen so that we fall on our faces and seek and praise God. Then if we are faithful to give God the glory, our brothers and sisters will be uplifted and encouraged and those who do not believe can be drawn closer to Him. So just as vs. 18 says, we fix our eyes not on what is seen but what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary but what is unseen is eternal.
My financial trouble is temporary.
My heartache is temporary.
My fear is temporary.
My insecurity is temporary.
God's love, faithfulness, redeeming power and glory are eternal.
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